This is post is in response to naijababes post "liberated women". Before i do address the post, i want to pick on a comment i saw...
Firstly i would like to say.. i am not picking on the person who wrote this comment, i just wanted to highlight a part of the comment i was reading the comment with someone and their reaction was very different to mine.
"I must say my mother worked & so did my father, n there was alws food on d table n d house was always clean.
Some men just have that type of mentality, n it can be trace back to their home. I must tell u that some women do not mind staying @ home as house wives. I guess such women r made 4 these men.
I do not bliv women r d home makers, instead both the husband n wife make d home. A home cannot b made by only 1 party, it won't b complete."
The bit highlighted in red, incase anyone is colour blind -" Some men just have that type of mentality, n it can be traced back to their home."...There is a tendency in nigeria, when kids do something wrong to blame their parents, which is not called for( because no individual has the right to tell someone else how to raise their own child) but the reasoning at times is logical. But then we also take the extra step in stereotyping something or someone based on very little knowledge or from 'hear say'.
I have often heard this stereotype in nigeria and it is now f***ing annoying. When relatives start doing thier background check and what not. They often ask if the guys or girls parents are still together and if not they are immediately deemed as coming from a broken home with the theory- that if their parents have a broken marriage that the child has a very high probability of getting divorced as he might not take his marriage seriously or see it as the norm..there for he would not be first pick for marriage...what the hell is that meant to mean? marriage is not some kind of generational trend that descends from one generation to the other.. There are countless people who's parents are together, they got married and got divorced, what do you know say about those?
Dont get me wrong, my parents are still together..infact i had this conversation with my mum and she was saying the same thing...i was sooo annoyed at her that i just cut the phone and didnt speak to her for a couple of days.
if we are going to stick with this generational theory then we might as well come to the conclusion that, a lot of men cheat in their marriage (For those who like to believe that their fathers have never cheated, i commend you for having faith)..therefore we their children, will probably cheat in our marriages. Which girl wants to marry someone that will cheat on her and possibly having children outside the marriage...no one..doesnt that mean that all the children who's parent have cheated are unsuitable for marriage, or rather we're not first pick...
What is the problems with people and marriages in nigeria sef....Someone is not married, they will complain go and get married.....the person gets married and does not have a child now, they will now be on top the girls head as if she is a witch that is stealing her husbands sperm (sorry to be graphic)....If she is a single momsi they will be trying to rush her into marriage and yet belittling her behind her back about how she cannot hold a marriage... Why do they act like marriage is such a simple thing like buying a phone or paying a parking ticket. It isnt, i cannot even relate it to anything else in life.
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